Oh baby
With a year of marriage successfully under our belts, the question in most of our family's minds has begun to surface and rear its ugly little fricking head:

When will you two be having a baby?

Or, if you're my mom, the question is:

When will I have a grandchild that's not a cat???

Well, mom, I can tell you this: we are discussing the possibility of getting a dog, so your wait may not be too long.

Ahem. The baby thing.

It's on my mind, certainly, as a lot of people at work are "in the family way." And who knows, it may happen soon, although we aren't planning on it.

My grandmother has had a baby outfit in her possession for two years, and is waiting for either my cousin or myself to give birth to the first great-grandchild, and it's also in her will that the first of us to birth the first great-grandchild shall be bequeathed said baby outfit. She brings it up at each family occasion. My cousin is younger than I, and although she is dating someone seriously, there are no plans for marriage or children as far as I know. So the heat is on me, and me alone.

There are many concerns to be weighed. The financial issue is a biggie. The bottom line: we ain't got no money. Second, what would we do about day care? Third, what kind of raving bitch will I be once I have had no sleep in weeks? Fourth, what if my child turns into a punk? I saw some kids today at the baseball game who utterly frightened me. There was a boy, he had to have been no older than 8, wearing a chain around his neck and an Eminem concert tee-shirt. He also happened to look exactly like Eminem. I don't want this to happen to my child!

So the answer is, I'm not sure. When it happens, I'll be happy, but please, mom, grandma, everyone, don't start knitting booties yet.

I'll take a pooper scooper though, if you've got one.