Friday, April 30

Yes, I think it's fairly safe to say that the eye twitch is back, it's kicking ass and taking names. Oh, I feel so freaky. I can't look at anyone in the eye, because I'm afraid that my scary eye malfunction will scare them away.

"Did you see that weird eye twitching girl? What's the deal with her eye? I mean, it just... twitches!" [/jerry seinfeld voice]

I'm sitting on the couch, watching Survivor last night, and my eye is just twitching like there's no tomorrow. My husband tells me to stop stressing out. But I'm watching Survivor. On the couch. I'm not stressing. I know who's getting voted off. I know who wins reward. I know that Jeff Probst is going to say "the tribe has spoken." Right now my life is good.

This morning I thought the twitch was gone, but as I'm getting closer and closer to my place of employment, the twitching gets more intense. It feels like popcorn is popping inside my eyelid.

That's why I'm declaring today to be Dress Like a Pirate at Work Day. That way, if I wear an eyepatch, I won't feel like I should go live on an island with other freaky weird twitchy people and talk about twitchy things and eat twitchy foods and watch twitchy television.

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