Office Update

Incompetent But Likeable, Computer-Illiterate Guy is wearing two different-colored socks today. He has not, as of yet, asked me how to e-mail an attachment, but the day is young. I don't think the challenge has presented itself to him yet. Oh, but it will, but it will.

I suggested to the "team" that we take a "team day" to the new Legacy Village shopping center which is opening Friday. Stores include: Crate and Barrel, Restoration Hardware, Ann Taylor Loft, Cheesecake Factory and more. Bad Lady was all for it. Naturally. Would boss approve? Does boss have to know?

Past Team Days have included: trip to Natural History Museum, trip to Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame, the Eight Mile Hike From Hell, and trip to Jacobs Field, where Jonesarelli was known to see the clock on the scoreboard, evoke the spirit of Jessica Simpson and say, "2:31. Is that how much time is left in the game?" It's something we do once a year to promote team bonding and to get away from the office. I don't honestly think we'll go to Legacy Village; I just want an excuse to go.

Shall I elaborate on the Eight Mile Hike From Hell? It is the stuff of legend around my workplace. Other departments still make fun of my boss for submitting his department to such torture. Picture it: July 2002, temperature approximately 89 degrees (seriously), and I'm in the deep woods with my boss, the Bad Lady, Incompetent But Likeable Computer-Illiterate Guy and the rest of the cast of characters. My boss has his fanny pack on, which is filled with camping essentials such as "gorp" and Luna bars, which are composed of sawdust, and is sure to point out to us the many wonders of nature that one sees in the woods. Which includes but is not limited to: tree trunks, snake holes, and ant colonies. I believe I was quoted as saying that I hoped to be mauled by a bear. This was supposed to be an activity that brought our department closer together, but it is really fortunate that no one was "accidentally" pushed off a cliff during this adventure. Scarcasm was dripping from my pores, intermingled with the rampant sweat. I think I actually told my boss I hated him when he asked for the 45th time, "How's everybody doin' back there?"

I still haven't really forgiven him for the whole thing. Nor do I plan to. He is no longer allowed to pick the Team Day locale. So Legacy Village it is.